Yesterday we wanted to take our family to a nearby beach here in Puerto Vallarta—we’d spent a lot of time inside with Tom working for the past couple weeks. This house doesn’t have a yard, so we have to make an effort to do more outings. We took a taxi to a beach about 30 minutes away that we’d heard about—Playa Mismaloya. It was so refreshing to be in the cool water, the waves bouncing us around. We built some sand castles, and relaxed on shore for awhile, in between enjoying the water. Then we walked down to a beachside restaurant to eat. After dinner we all went back into the water again. The sun was getting low, a few pelicans were chilling in the water nearby, and the waves were still rocking us, so we’d jump as they’d come. Seeing our girls’ sun-kissed faces as they squealed in delight, Tom and I shared a smile. “I want to hold onto this moment,” I said.
Joshua Becker’s book, Clutter-free with Kids was a book Tom & I both read a few years ago. It inspired us to live more simply. He talks a lot about why living with less can be life-changing.
For too long we’ve bought into the lie that more is better. We’ve bought trendier clothes and cooler toys—clutter has accumulated. But we’ve traded far more than time and money to acquire them. We’ve traded the very passions and life we most desperately desire to pursue.
But they can be rediscovered.
—Joshua Becker
This trip has shown us how little we can get by with, and that experiences are more valuable than possessions. Mexico and El Salvador are full of friendly people, beautiful beaches, volcanoes, waterfalls, great hikes, diverse zoos, ranches, and incredible animals in the wild—dolphins, turtles, whales, coatis, tropical fish, colourful birds, iguanas, etc..
Having less stuff to look after is actually quite liberating and eye-opening. We didn’t know that taking our kids away from all the comforts of Canada—a big house, most of their toys, a school with lots of friends, and familiar places to go—would benefit them in so many ways. By exposing them to the "Great Unknown,” we embraced the opportunity to open their eyes and minds to bigger things. They have had to adapt to minimalistic living at the same time. "You don't have room in your bag for that toy." And because they know it's true, they almost always agree. But we've also resorted to, "You don't actually need a new dress..." And we've had lots of opportunities to talk about needs versus wants.
Our girls have seen lots of people who don't have enough food, wearing their only set of stained, worn clothes. When we see a crippled or blind person begging in the downtown center, our girls often ask how we can help them. And then they want to be the one to give them something, whether food or money. These are the kinds of things I'd always wanted for my girls—to show them how most of the world lives, so their perspective on having things would shift. I'm not saying that we don't have poor people in Canada too. But staying in a country where the average wage is $20/day or less, and poverty is right in front of you, can be overwhelming at times.
It changes you, if you let it. When you go into a store like Walmart, and see all the clothes, toys, and household items—most of the time, you don't even take a second glance. Whereas in Canada, we tend to have more consumeristic attitudes. And often think, "Well, I don't have any extra money right now to help people..." But why is that...? Why do we need so many pairs of shoes, jackets, toys, and kitchen accessories? I've been guilty of this. This trip has helped prove to me that I didn't need more than about 20 items of clothes in nine months—even in cooler weather, when my two pairs of pants and a warm-ish jacket came in handy. It definitely helps that we're travelling, so whatever doesn't "fit" and isn't needed gets given away. In many parts of North America, people are waking up to this and building "tiny homes." As a rule, the less you can fit, the less you will buy. And usually, the more room you have, the more you will buy in a consumeristic culture. It's true, whether you live in a tiny home or in a huge mansion.
Our girls have asked us for years if we can PLEASE get an RV. It would be fun, right?! Our friends and family members who have them enjoy using them in the summertime. But then we would have needed to buy a truck to pull it. And find a place to park the RV for the 10-11 months that we would NOT have been using it. Camping in a tent can actually be pretty fun. We've discovered some innovative ways to hang a tarp up when it rains. It's never quite as glamorous as an RV, but it's what we do. And we've never needed a truck so far!
Back home, I often found myself getting sucked into consumerism—buying clothes or other items I didn't really need. Sometimes I'd take a month or even three “off” shopping—marking it on the calendar that I was on a break, so I’d remember—other than to get NEEDED things. In a sense I had to break free from it again to prove to myself I could.
“The things you own end up owning you.”
— Tyler Durden, Fight Club
We’ve stayed in about 20-30 different homes in the last nine months. And I’ve come to realize that if there’s a few beds, a fridge, and running water, we’ll be ok. On this trip I bring my "laundry room" with me—it's a bar of laundry soap and a rope for a clothesline. These items come in super handy when we don't have a washing machine and the weather's warm—that’s been the case for alot of the trip. It can take awhile to hand-wash and hang everything, but a good podcast is all I need.
When you shift from consumerism to minimalism, you end up with so much more time, energy, and money to focus on more meaningful things, like seeking adventure. For us, the funny part is that we'd attempted to do the minimalist thing several times. Usually we’d declutter one room, and feel great about the three boxes we now had ready to donate. But it wasn’t till we actually HAD to take major steps to downsize that we finally did—selling most of our stuff and packing for this trip. When each item you’re bringing has to matter, you ask yourself, "What do I actually NEED..? What can I leave behind?" And we’ve been doing this monthly, which is a habit I hope to continue, even after we settle down again.
Another habit is not buying things that would hardly get used, like certain toys. Our girls have proven that they don’t really play with much besides Lego. And they usually find great joy when I buy them a pack of coloured paper—colouring, cutting, gluing, and creating. As for most other toys, we've noticed, they either break quickly or get tossed aside after a day or two.
Owning too much stuff steals our time, energy, and finances, but mostly it steals our joy. Things require upkeep and storage, and they take up our mental space without us even realizing it. It’s often challenging to give things away, but it’s incredibly rewarding to have less cluttering up our lives. 💛
Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth…but store up for yourselves treasures in heaven…for where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.
Matthew 6:19-20
Love your take on all of this -- I currently live in a 2 bedroom 1 bath with my husband and 3 small children. We just remodeled a few years ago and removed all closets and cabinets to maximize on space. We have a pantry with shelves for our kitchen storage but what a wake up call when we saw all of the stuff we were NOT using daily. Minimalism is always an on-going journey, to me, that's why it's fun.
A line I love & will remember from this one is the strategy of taking a bar of soap and piece of rope w/ me, (that even rhymes). You've garnered and are sharing some great principles for happiness and meaningful family time :)